{"id":8036,"date":"2022-03-24T01:00:00","date_gmt":"2022-03-24T05:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newspaperhistory.com\/?p=8036"},"modified":"2022-03-24T01:00:00","modified_gmt":"2022-03-24T05:00:00","slug":"suggestion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/suggestion\/","title":{"rendered":"Suggestion"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

From <\/em>The Times Dispatch, March 24, 1914<\/em><\/a>. By Thomas Lomax Hunter.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Old Doctor Dopem is a quack
Who publishes an almanac,
And manufactures Dopem\u2019s Pills
(Sure cure for fifty-seven ills!)
Now I, by some unlucky chance
Through Dopem\u2019s Almanac did glance\u2014
Until that hour my health was sound
As any man\u2019s for miles around.
Before I\u2019d read the booklet through
My wonder and my terror grew,
Till all I hoped was to be spared
A few more days to be prepared.
I read the symptoms of disease
And cried, \u201cWhy, I have all of these!\u201d
It said, \u201cIf you feel tired at night,
And sleepy, with no appetite
When you\u2019ve consumed a hearty meal,
And sorter sluggish\u2014if you feel
When you are cold, a strong desire
To get up closer to the fire,
You\u2019ve got it brother!\u2014but there\u2019s hope!
Take Dopem\u2019s Sanitary Dope!
(See what Miss Mugg, of Saginaw,
Says D. S. D. did for her paw.)\u201d
It said, \u201cIf with a pain you moan
When stricken on your crazy bone;
If you get peeved and speak with scorn
When someone camps upon your corn,
Your nerves are in a fearful state!
Take D. S. D., \u2019tis death to wait.\u201d
As of each new disease I read,
I felt myself grow cold with dread,
Till I thought Dopem, at the end,
My only hope, my only friend.
Then I reflected that I took
All my diseases from his book,
And thought I\u2019d rather have the bliss
Of my old ignorance than this,
For one who needs a book to tell
He\u2019s sick is just as good as well.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

From The Times Dispatch, March 24, 1914. By Thomas Lomax Hunter. Old Doctor Dopem is a quackWho publishes an almanac,And manufactures Dopem\u2019s Pills(Sure cure for fifty-seven ills!)Now I, by some unlucky chanceThrough Dopem\u2019s Almanac did glance\u2014Until that hour my health was soundAs any man\u2019s for miles around.Before I\u2019d read the booklet throughMy wonder and my […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,20],"tags":[291],"class_list":["post-8036","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-newspapers","category-the-times-dispatch","tag-thomas-lomax-hunter"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8036","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8036"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8036\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8036"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8036"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8036"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}