{"id":8946,"date":"2022-12-26T01:00:00","date_gmt":"2022-12-26T06:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.newspaperhistory.com\/?p=8946"},"modified":"2022-12-26T01:00:00","modified_gmt":"2022-12-26T06:00:00","slug":"arithmetic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/arithmetic\/","title":{"rendered":"Arithmetic"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><em>From the <a href=\"https:\/\/chroniclingamerica.loc.gov\/lccn\/sn99021999\/1914-12-26\/ed-1\/seq-4\/\">Omaha Daily Bee, December 26, 1914<\/a>. By Grip Alexander.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>The ashman worked away with vim.<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;His terms are far from small.<br\/>Before a man can talk to him<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He\u2019s got to hire a haul.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>Said I, \u201cWell, here\u2019s a great to-do!<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I\u2019ve ashes fine to sell,<br\/>And I must give them all to you<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And give you cash as well!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>He showed me all his teeth and laughed<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A laugh to raise the roof,<br\/>And flashed an answer free from craft,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;\u201cDat sholy am de truf!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cAt fifteen cents a barrel flat,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Ten barrels to the load,<br\/>Each night \u2019tis mighty riches that<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You tote to your abode.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>Said he, \u201cWell, sah, it\u2019s dish yere way!<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;All business am a risk,<br\/>Ah mos\u2019ly makes one load a day\u2014<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Excusin\u2019 when trade\u2019s brisk.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cAh pays a quartah at de dump,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;An\u2019 dat don\u2019 make me holler;<br\/>But when dem prices takes a jump<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;It done cost half a dollar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cAn\u2019 dat ol\u2019 ornery hoss o\u2019 mine<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Is needin\u2019 oats an\u2019 hay.<br\/>Ah guess his livin\u2019 ain\u2019 too fine<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;At sixty cents a day.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cDump charges, stabling, feed,\u201d I said,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;\u201cWill eat up cash like sin.<br\/>And wear and tear! Say, uncle Ned,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Just where do you come in?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n<p>The look he flashed was bright and quick,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;His voice was soft, caressin\u2019,<br\/>\u201cAh\u2019s right smart at arithmetic,<br\/>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;But dat sho has me guessin\u2019!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>From the Omaha Daily Bee, December 26, 1914. By Grip Alexander. The ashman worked away with vim.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;His terms are far from small.Before a man can talk to him&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He\u2019s got to hire a haul. Said I, \u201cWell, here\u2019s a great to-do!&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I\u2019ve ashes fine to sell,And I must give them all to you&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And give you cash as [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3,4],"tags":[146],"class_list":["post-8946","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-newspapers","category-omaha-daily-bee","tag-grip-alexander"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8946","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8946"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8946\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8946"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8946"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desperaudio.com\/newspaperpoetry\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8946"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}